Cookies at Christmas

BG: 70

Doing a cookie swap.
So, the question is, what do I make?

How about Cappuccino Crinkles?
Sounds sooooo good, doesn't it?

There's a part of me that feels guilt not making something sugar free. When I was growing up, my diet was always about what I could get sugar free. Holidays and special occasions consisted of the extra stuff... fake oreos, sugar free gummy bears and candy canes. I'm working my way out of that guilt trip. I don't blame anyone for those conceptions, that's just the way diabetes worked twenty years ago. Now, it's different.

My cookbook is wonderful enough to give me nutritional values, so Carb counting is made easy and my insulin doses are USUALLY accurate. My first doctor EVER, Dr. Whalen, always reminded me to give myself a break. Have a cookie on occasion because a rigid mentality would lead to burnout. He was probably right, but I wouldn't know, because I've been giving myself a break for 20 years! Haha. That didn't sound right. anyway, I'm just grateful to him for steering me towards mental health as well as physical health.

Have a great NEW WEEK!
Read something fun.
Bethanne

Diabetes or Fat?

BG: 114

This morning, my family was fortunate [and blessed] to take part in the annointing of the sick. It was a spur of the moment gesture after Mass that my Hubby thought we could do. Everyone's been under the weather for days and days.

So, I'm sitting there, and my mind drifts to the days when praying for healing seemed like a big deal. [Not saying it isn't, btw] But when I get to the bottom line, I start comparing....

Would you rather be Diabetic or Fat?

Well, Diabetic, thank you very much. I'm not about to make any deals with God over this disease, that's for sure. It can be a pain, but it's not the end of the world. There are worse things in life than Diabetes--like child abuse or cancer or loneliness....

So, I prayed for healing today. Prayed that God would clear my sinuses, clear my kids' sinuses, and get my hubby a job [that's a kind of healing too, if you ask me :D].

I'd love to know, what would you trade for your Diabetes?

BG: 75

Three days and nothing to worry about.
YAY! That's what I'm thinking on right now as Saturday comes to an end, and I realize, I've had my kids in this house for THREE days with only a few minor disturbances. :D

Not bad, eh? Makes me think Christmas break will be tolerable AND enjoyable!
How did your break end? Are you still with us? Are you laid out, exhausted from the travel and activities?

I'm wishing you peace!
With Love,
Bethanne

Suckage

BG: 397 <-- who has the power now? WTF

You know that commercial for antique roadshow?
Sometimes you win, sometimes you don't.

Right now, I have no clue.

Health Insurance

BG: 107

You know I've been sick for a while... well, today I finally feel like I'm back on my feet for good, and tomorrow I will exercise. Yay!

Unfortunately, we are not going to see family for Thanksgiving. It's part okay and part disappointing. You know, after a good 5 days of being down, an 8 hour trip hardly sounds exciting. More than that, though, my brother-in-law is supposed to have surgery in December. It's a surgery he has rescheduled at least twice. Can you imagine if he caught something while we were there?!?!?! We'd never live it down! Not only that, but the've met all the deductibles for the year...and if they have to go next summer, they'll end up paying way more out-of-pocket.

Let me tell you, this is something I completely understand! I do not want my name on anything that may [or may not] hinder this surgery from happening. :D We're all praying for you, John! Maybe we'll see you after Christmas.

So, Matt has scheduled the first ever Annual Wii Tournament!! All day Thursday to battle the best in games like Wii Sport, Wii Ski, Mario Kart, and Lego Star Wars.
May the best Strasser win.
~Bethanne

SICK!

BG: 130

ICK! Rhino Virus. The common cold. Congestion. Inability to speak.
My suagrs are stable, though. I find that a plus, because in the past, I've always found my sugars high when I was sick.

...maybe my basals really have been that far off for that long. Ugh.

I am taking meds that are not diabetic recommended. Nite Time Cold and Flu. It helps. Thank God, no fevers, just inconvenience. :) AND, I'm starting to feel better.

Travelling to my sister-in-law's this week for Thanksgiving and looking forward to it.
I hope everyone has a blessed holiday full of family and thankgiving.
Today, I'm especially thankful for Sunshine. :D
Take care,
Bethanne

VLOG--Diabetes Police

I thought I'd share this insightful episode from Mike Lawson:

If I had a million Dollars Game

BG: 182
Stole this one from my other BLOG.

You remember that song by Bare Naked Ladies? If I had a million dollars I'd buy you a monkey? Well somehow it got stuck in my head the other day and hasn't gone away. And it's left me wondering what five things I would want if I had a million dollars. OK, more like a say, ten million (accounting for inflation since that song came out), but for reasons of cleverness in this blog post title, if I had a million dollars I would ...


Have a library like this ...




In a house like this ... [yes, there's a housekeeper]




And drive this car ...




Vacation here ...




With style like this ...




Now it's your turn. Pick five things you would have/do if you had unlimited funds. Trust me, I know we'd all do something good with that money (I'd set up funds for couples wishing to adopt), but this is a purely selfish post. So be selfish and on your blog, post five pictures of what you would do with a million dollars. Be sure to put a link to your blog in the comments so I can see what you all would really want!

End of Day Report

BG: 63

Reaching the end of my day with a scowl, I thought to myself, "Are you going to let CRAP win?"

So, I put my sweats on and did my morning exercises. 30 minutes of high intensity aerobics with Ellen on Crunch, Burn and Firm: Pilates.

I made Donuts

BG: 147

Yes, I did. And they are gooooood. So I gave about half of them away. What can a diabetic girl do? Right? Still, my family enjoyed them...and I find my time in the kitchen soothing, which I really need a lot of right now.

And praying helps. Remembering all the things I'm thankful for, how I'm blessed. Offering my crazy rantings up to God would be a good thing to do BEFORE I go off on my hubby... LOL

I skipped exercise this morning. WHY?! I wish I hadn't. Tomorrow will be a new day. Tomorrow, I'll exercise. Mall walking, anyone? :D

World Diabetes Day

It's a day to celebrate all the blessings...

Can't Stop

BG: 155

Every afternoon, I start eating...and I can't seem to stop. A little snack here, and little snack there. Here a snack, there a snack, everywhere a snack, snack. Consequently, my sugars before dinner have been up near 200 for about 3 days. I even increased my basal a hair yesterday to try to curb that curve. Didn't work.

Maybe it's the exercise. I'm finishing up my first week of exercising regularly. It's possible I just need to be more careful.

Mindful snacking is okay...it's the mindless kind that keeps biting me in the butt!!!

...could be that time of the month. :P
Have a great weekend, everyone.
~Bethanne

End of Day Report

BG: 158

I had a pleasant memory today. A good one, from before Diabetes. I've thought of it off and on throughout the years and a friend's post about candy on Facebook today resurrected it.

When I was a kid, three little girls could walk... at least 6 blocks to 7-Eleven. Gosh, it might have even been more like ten or fifteen! [The world was definitely bigger then.] We had our stash of cash, and came back to Mary's house with good gobs of candy. I remember the Runts especially. I don't know why. After sorting it all, and rationing it, we took off to do something else.

Whatever we were doing in those days...a quick trip to Richmond Park, a run through the sprinkler, a walk around the block to me and my sister's house. On our return, we found Mary's brother eating our CANDY!

The memory sets a glaring light on how different my world is today. Forget Diabetes, how different the world is for my children. Where is the freedom of childhood for my children? It doesn't exist like it did before. Do I move to a smaller town? Do I search for the past?

My memories of life on the West side are so dear to me. Friends from those days are still my friends today and will be my friends tomorrow, too. When I write my stories, I pull from those memories. I pull from the emotions those memories evoke, because they are heartfelt and reminiscent of innocence. Deep down, I think the memories are why my stories so often feature reunions, old friendships and lost love. [No, I'm not pining over lost love. :P]

So, tell me. What is your favorite childhood memory?
...and have a great week!
~Bethanne

Secret Feelings

BG: 114

I'm really okay with my diabetes. It can be pain, but overall...there are worse things. Like Diane, a mother from my kids' school who sings in the choir at church on Sunday and was diagnosed with breast cancer.

I complain about insurance, how inconvenient, how seemingly inefficient it is, yet I recieved 800 test strips last week and only paid $71. I might have paid $51, but wanted to get them overnighted. That's... Wow. I ordered the CGMS and paid just under $200. When I get down or discouraged about how much my premiums are, I only have to do the math to realize, I'm making out.

I got an email this evening that put me on RED alert. Selfish, unkind thoughts running rampant through my mind at the thought that my brother-in-law bought a house [and it's awesome! says he]. I'm really happy for him... and really surprised by the jealous, discontented feelings that sprung up in my heart over such good news. :(

What's your secret feeling? Is there someone you love, who you've never told? Do you dream of things that might never be? A dislike that brings you to your knees?

Some days, I feel that there is so much inside me...with nowhere to put it. It's like carrying that skeleton instead of stuffing it in the closet. *sigh*

How morose!!! [to be uplifted visit Kerri Sparling]
Better days on the morrow.
Take care,
Bethanne

Going Out

BG: 140 [thank God (and my insulin)! down after a hyper afternoon]

Messed up my afternoon with a high. Not sure exactly how it happened, but when I checked it found it 301, corrected [more on that in a minute] and checked again in an hour, it was still 269. I feel I know myself pretty well. I keep my sensitivity at 4hours knowing that I probably peak at about 2-2.5 hours because usually when I correct, I'm down by at least half in an hour. So, I changed my site, just in case and corrected again.

I did some unaccounted for snacking. I'm pretty sure. An oversight that bit my ....butt later. So, when my correction units said .8, I doubled. My pump keeps track of how much insulin is active--and though some people say, bleh--I really like this feature.

Anyway, I'm off to Dougherty's Pub and Pins for dinner with some girlfriends. A much needed night out. Cheers!
Bethanne

End of Day Report

BG: 78 -- drats, I'll have to eat something...but not too much because then my sugar will probably pop right out of the lines. *eyeroll* Maybe with my new overnight basal I shouldn't eat at all. Maybe I can cruise on this... yeah, right. The risk is too high.

See? Now I was going to get on here and talk about something NOT diabetes related!

Like, hey! I read this really fun book over the weekend. Heather Graham's The Death Dealer, a whodunit of classic proportions. Wonderful dialogue, colorful characters and even ghosts thrown in to make it all a little more interesting. Have you ever watched the old black and white movies? Gas Light? Arsenic and Old Lace? That's how reading this felt. It was perfect for the Halloween weekend.

Did I figure it out? Not officially. :D I was never able to pin it down... perhaps my wits have been dulled by too much Max and Ruby and Baby Einstein. Late nights and early mornings...

One other thing, my husband made the most unusual gesture yesterday. He was telling me about his day in the woods. He's hunting for deer this week. He had a chance at a doe, but didn't take it because it had a fawn with it. I looked at him with a question in my eye and he shrugged, "The fawn needs someone to look after it."

I shook my head with a smile. Maybe that's SOP for hunters, but I'd never thought of it before, and to hear that tender sentiment was surprising... and nice.

So I teased him for being a softy.

National Bethanne Month

That's what I'm calling it because not only is it National Diabetes [Awareness] Month, it's also National Novel Writing Month....

now, I'm not sure what to do about the diabetes month, but for sure, I'll be spending any spare time I have adding words to a new manuscript for this years race to 50k. How to combine the two....

Well, there's always a Glucose testing marathon....
or perhaps a no simple sugar AT ALL challenge. *scratching head* Hmm...
A get-your-own-CGMS goal. I like that one.

I guess, the thing of it is... diabetes is more than writing the next novel. I can put my writing aside when I get tired or discouraged. I can pick up a favorite book to read in hopes of inspiration. Getting out with friends and family helps me revitalize the muses.

So, maybe it's not just my month. Maybe it's everyone else's month, too. Time to help others become aware of the disease that effects so many people from birth to middle age to death. So, I think, once a week, I will recognize another person on my blog who has diabetes like me.